Another useful method to de-escalate anger is to use distraction. This is cooling off physiologically by spending time in an environment where it is likely to be less provoked.

For example, if you are in an argument with another person, it means you need to walk away and go somewhere where you will no longer be provoked.

Researchers such as Zillmann have found that distractions are highly powerful mood-altering devices. After all, if you are having a pleasant time, it is hard to stay angry. Of course, the trick is that you need to cool down enough so you can start to have a pleasant time in the first place.

Here are a number of suggestions on cooling down:

• Go for a walk. It is much better to go for a long walk than a drive, since the physical exercise itself also helps to reduce your arousal and subsequently your anger.
• Relaxation exercises, or deep breathing. This simply reduces your arousal state.
• Go to gym. After a good work out, the body will automatically go into a low arousal mode which can help you with managing your anger.
• Be alone in a quiet place. Calmness and less chance of getting provoked by anything else (voices, phone calls, other requests, sirens, etc.) will help you to get back to normal state. This is why some people enjoy watching an aquarium for a long time as a calming technique.
• Distract yourself with a hobby. When you are engaged in a creative activity, you have little time to think of anything else and the pleasant activity can easily calm you down.
• Watch a movie, listen to music.
• Use your imagination. Picture something comforting you like. For example, picture yourself on holiday, on the beach when the sun is shining, the sky is blue, the sand is white, and the ocean is vast and crystal clear…

Remember, in any of these activities, don’t let your mind to think of the event again as you will simply get back to square one by starting to find all sorts of reasons why you should be angry. Although, research shows that shopping or eating may not help either as these activities don’t necessarily stop your mind from going on over the details of the events and hence getting angrier again.